Memo to Amazon: I’m sad

ITEM! My good friend Glenn apparently didn’t get the memo that November is “Let’s All Stop Writing Our Blogs For A While” month, and sent me an email asking for updates.

Of course, it’s my own fault. I’ve spent the last week building a new desk. Part of the problem of buying and loving oversized comics is that you need a big reading surface for them. I read everything at my desk, and my current desk, a fiberboard construction I’ve had since the late 90s, just isn’t big enough. It had no open “real estate” to place anything but a small manga book, making reading a challenge. One night two weeks ago, I broached the topic of getting a new desk to my wife, and she agreed with me. Rather than wait for her to change her mind, I rushed out and got a much bigger desk at Staples.

This desk is, as the Swedish would say, Yuge. Therein lies the problem- I live in the upper floor of a two-family home. The package weighed too much to be carried up the stairs, so I did what I normally do in these situations. I opened the package in the car, and made a few trips up and down the stairs bringing up pieces of the desk each time. This worked until I got to the final piece, the desktop itself. I failed to adjust for its size and awkwardness, and pulled a few rib and back muscles in the process. Ouch! I also had some problems with the actual assembly of the desk; I had to contact the manufacturer to replace parts that were damaged when one of the two desk hutches tumbled over in mid-construction.

I finished the desk last night. Tonight, I have to move everything off the old desk, move it out of the space, clean up the area, and then move the new desk in. I’ll take photos and share. Woot!

ITEM! Amazon.com has betrayed me this morning. I feel a loss.

Amazon’s Gold Box program used to heavily rely upon the favorites list generated by your browsing and purchase history on the site. This meant that if I spent time cultivating my favorites on Amazon, ranking books I liked highly and ones I didn’t poorly, I ran a good chance of getting a book I wanted at a lower-than-normal price. Each day was like pulling a slot machine- ten items would be presented at random, each carrying a larger discount than normal. Sometimes it would be wonky (apparently, it thinks I have a thing for out-of-stock purses. No wallets, just purses. Scary.), but you could get some great deals on occasion.

Apparently, that day has come to an end. Now, everyone gets the same item in their Gold Box. I’m heartbroken; Amazon now knows everything about my book preferences, but refuses to reward me for that information. The item for sale today is a Coleman 54-quart cooler. It’s a brisk autumn in New Jersey; I don’t think I’m really in the market for such an item.

It’s my own fault, really. I’ve been abusing Buy.com‘s Google Checkout promotion that ended yesterday. I was getting $10 off every $30 I spent. It was a weird deal, because you couldn’t get the deal if you were logged in to your own account. Instead, you logged out of your Buy.com account, shopped anonymously on the site, and then checked out using Google. I was getting a discount without providing Buy with the critical information about myself that it really wants.

Last night, I tried making one last purchase, since the plan was expiring. But Google Checkout seemed to crash, and I couldn’t purchase that last Krazy Kat book needed to complete my collection. Of course, I can purchase it at Amazon for a low price, and they’ll ship it two-day for free (I was granted a free month of Amazon Prime, their promotional shipping discount program). But I won’t get a super-low price like I would have gotten at Buy/Google.

I feel like I’ve been dumped. Today, neither site truly “wants” me. Buy.com isn’t offering me $10 off $30 anymore, while Amazon will no longer reward me for all those times I spent whispering in its ear about my love for Essentials and Masterworks. I’ve been jilted by two lovers, it appears.

Good thing Tales of Wonder has a big sale going on…

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